Tuesday, April 14, 2009

short there tall here

my height is about 160 cm. and here, in indonesia, i'm already considered tall in my group of age (13, in august will be 14). and i like being tall. but one day i was attending the java jazz festival and i watched jason mraz. there, there are many people from around indonesia and even from another country. that's where it hit me hard...
i'm like a dwarf there! there are sooooooooo many people even much much much taller than me and that made me angry! don't know why, but i just hate being short like that hahaha.. and i couldn't help my self of being jealous of the taller people. i know that i have to be greatful for my body, but i just couldn't help my self! and also, having a dream of becoming an actress there (hollywood), i'm scared that they are going to underestimate me just because i'm short if i ever make it there. and that really bugs me because i really really really want to make it to hollywood. because of that, i have a new habit, if i heard a petite celebrity, i search them on imdb.com (internet movie data base) and i'll see their biography. and ofcourse i'll look in the height section, they always put the celebs height hahaha. and seeing the numbers, 160, 168, 185 (????????) really make me want to jump and jump until i'm atleast 165 cm tall. but, when i see the celebs whose height is 155 or less, i feel greatful of my body. but then i'll started thinking that this is just a small part of the celebs and there are many others that are taller. aaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggghhhhhhh that just make me furious! but now, i'm trying to get rid of this jealousy and be greatful about my body because i realise that there are many other people who are shorter than me and hopefully, someone will recognize my talent not based on my size :D

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